Fly Day

First day of shift is fuck day. You usually come at ten pm or later, some people fly two days to get here, get up is at three and feel fucked. Shitty day, shitty day, shitty day, shitty day, shitty day, steak day, four shitty days, laundry day, pack day and fly day.

I heard that when Trump was flying out from G7 summit, his plane delayed crew change flights and people got to camp at 1 am.

Wake up at 1:57. Quick packing, I have little. Metaphor. I still leave socks, shirts in storage , hoping to return. Garbage bin in hall overflows on shift change days.

Rolling to storage to leave  my beat up , no zip handles, brown suitcase.  I reuse the name tag.

First set, I gathered all my shit in black garbage bag and carried it from shack to Rundle. Dustin later says - we thought you left, took all your stuff.  Second set, I took everything, my rubber boots, I didn’t want to return. But I came back.

There is no time in Fort Fireweed. Just count to days. Fly day never counted. Six more days, five more days, two more days, pack day - one more,and then fly day. You can track people moods and attitude to work by where they are in the set .

Warm night, no rain, smoke pit , 2:10 am, moon shrank, bangs on east.

Lights of Canada convinced us to throw everything at a chance for the dream. We wish it is not as birds of passage that we came here, we wish for permanence, finality. The lack of opportunity pushes, as well as millions before us, elsewhere.

Even my old boss from Cochrane left Canada for work and did not look back. He was sad I left for Canada, more so than I was leaving.

On morning toolbox, Travis:

– by the way, all flights are cancelled.. wear gloves (almost reluctantly) I don’t make the rules. I don’t do write ups, Carl does.

-what about Trey

-Fuck Trey. You see bears, don’t pet them, don’t feed them

-coyotes dangerous?

-no, they’re small

-small, but brave

The evening before Victor drove away not even looking at us. He quit. Travis told him to wear gloves, did’t wear face shield while using grinder.

Last fuel bay day

Paul. Minor oil leak. “Fuck, if nobody coming. Nobody give a fuck around here.You don’t have to fill it up. “

Cindy. You have a line-up sheet, Cindy?

-fuck no, she dismisses, last day.

The contrast with yesterday’s friendliness.

Yesterday in the hall, operators did not even recognize me. Nobody to them, a utility, attendant on their washroom break. I feel like shit.

Tucker. I don’t want to talk to you, go away to washroom, Tucker.

-I am in noooo rush. Take your time. Drain it. Fly day, fly day. I don’t know why you want to sit in first rows (talks to Luke), you’re fist to get off, but you’re last to board. See you at Rundle.

Please, no, not another truck. This is it. This is the whole of my story. I cry in the seacan. Generators hum, skidster is busy nearby. If I am not for myself who is there for me. Award lubricants. Performance Protection. Proven.

Around noon, we take fuel truck for service call-out. I point at Tucker passing by to Luke:

-John Wade Tucker, Wade is his Christian name

-I don’t think he’s Christian

Grader. Regen, we remind Bri to put the blade down– she. does not. how to run it – perfume, we work. Bunny guy, in truck next in line, honks as she crosses the road. She yells – WHAAAT? No princess. What was I thinking.

Bunny guy: after 2nd coffee break, two more rounds and done. We park at 4:45 pm, they squeeze every last drop of energy from you. He thrusts his arm forward, showing the squeezing. I honked at Bri, see if she is jumpy. Are we doing another cut? Not a lot of guys at 35-10.

Jun smokes with me, behind fuel bay, jokes, he’s obsessed. I deflect –I like women with brains. That’s why I like you. Laughs, smiles - you’re single in camp.

The company I worked for when I came to Canada, sold off all assets and made like a tree. Applied to seven hundred positions in Calgary, white collar unemployment is fifteen percent. For new in Canada, close to thirty.

Shoveled concrete knee deep at plus thirty, built new Stampede LRT station, Opus building on McLeod, warehouses near airport and the French dam outside the city. Seventy trucks one day.

Lack of Canadian experience. I am the Canadian experience.

I finish my last cigarette. Jun steams hoe. Eddie rushes to the truck.