Morning

2:30 AM. Cough behind the wall. Gym crowd in the hall. Rain. I could not fall asleep last night until maybe 11.

I turn on radio, hoping operations are down. Ops 15 silent, then suddenly:

- I am at zero-nine, I seem to have blocked power, is there trick or something

- Yeah, I am right by the bulldozer, the master is on, the D code is still active.

- Jake, if the code is not active, keep running and tow

Three years ago.

Ritz Carlton, first floor café, right after fancy pastry stand. We climb on tall chairs and I say to Rory, my boss, I am leaving, I am moving to Canada. His first reaction is genuine are-you-stupid “why would you move to Canada.” Rory is from Cochrane, grandson of Ukrainian immigrants who came to Canada in 1947 when Eastern Europe was a wasteland. I recall now the look of sadness on his face, regret – you have no idea.

- I am hard down

- Dump the load and move it to RMT7, Jake, but I need the code

Fuel run

Morning run imprints in my mind: Luke turns off differential lock after Ridge, roll on Sandpiper and rising 6 am sun. 97.7 Rock FM – “I don’t feel entertained.” Commanding voice of a woman on radio, 512 channel.

Rolling up to the work area, coyote just strolls between machines. D6, cabin smells like man, that distinct smell, key on left. Johny Cash on radio – I hurt myself today, very timely.

6030 bit smug dozer operator. Filled half says. Foam – I say. Operator stands on tracks observing as Luke fills up. Newbies are unforgiven. Mistakes define them. Current employees cut locks routinely, break trucks and graders, ignore and underfill at fuel bay, but it’s the new guy they’ll talk about.

Four haul trucks in circle of people at next stop. I notice a woman amongst them. I fill D10 to the brim. Luke curses as big truck coming on us crosses into his lane.

Luke worked at John Deere dealership since grade ten, for nine years, run excavators, then Northgate fuel and lube, got laid off, got here nine months ago.

Fuel day

I think about bus talk last night. Camp infatuations are fierce. Guys – Dustin, Derek, Luke, Victor started talking about some girl and how she messes up equipment. Derek, mechanic: she broke two graders already, she comes to me, asks all these questions, I am like here fixing your shit. He is indignant.

Dustin: she should not be a driver, dangerous.

I think they talk about Mika and say – Mika's truck broke down.

- Whatever her name

- I am not even sure, Bri

Turns out its Bri. Luke is silent. Victor looks eager to pounce, but nothing comes. Derek and Dustin talk about her ex-boyfriend, Juicy Josh from Metal Haul, in winter he’d come to let her warm up in his truck. I think that’s so sweet.

I glance at faces. Derek is still pissed he has to fix someone’s fuckups. Dustin avoids my glance.

Derek: she liked Egan too, oh she loved him. We used to make fun, finally told him, you know banging and he’s like (cuts off with his hand) – I. have. A girlfriend.

Mike, almost empty:

- Hello, LJ. Fucking Jerry was here? Drives like crazy, always on her (points to Rita – waiting in line) ass. Everyone is writing SOS on him.

Rita. I hear her complaining about Jerry to Luke. Oh, the haul truck drama, Luke sighs.

People are very observant, one glance, one view and everyone knows who went where, who is hiding what fuck-up. Saturday, Sunday, Monday and we go home. Luke says he’s tired from day one of the set.

Bunny guy: I hate this fucking trainee. He never done it before? He comes to the pile wrong side.I am like we gonna get this right even if I have to do it from passenger seat.

Dust wind begins, blows in every direction. Gust cuts my face with sand. This sand is so abrasive, cuts dozer segments like butter. We often change segments, they look like they’ve been sharpened on a lathe.

Jun sprays 6020 nearby. What’s the point of washing hoe in sand storm?

Waiting for Godot, waiting for Lavoie. In a glimpse of day dream, day goes forever, trucks, more trucks, and I am still waiting.

Grader: chokes, fuel, can’t reach all grease points . That is so OK now.

I tell him Luke was in hall at 8 pm yesterday and so many operators. It’s a whole world out there. Luke says they him told that getting up to catch 4 am bus is terrible –they don’t know how we do it.

Driver yells: its fucking Mad Max here!